Daily Archives: April 15, 2011

The Anticipation Grows…

Long time no type huh. Sorry about that. =\

I’m sitting here in the chair, wondering when I’ll be able to leave. Anticipation laces through my mind with probing questions, “How many more days? How many more events? What are your grades like? What will you do this summer?” My mind is achingly bored. These classes, though fun, are mind numbing on certain days and make me want to punch in a wall. Or a sheet of tissue paper…. that might be less painful. I’m jittery and on edge, counting down, figuring the hours that I still have to endure within these walls. It’s a tiresome wait. An agonizing wait. The days drag by slower and slower. I discover new things daily, and attempt to live with zest, zeal, and positivity. But it becomes difficult when no one is trying, no one is expecting great things, and no one expects things of you. I’m waiting. I’m waiting and waiting and waiting. What will tomorrow bring? What will my future look like? I can probably answer this question easier than the others. All I have done is obsess about my future, about the plans eventually to happen. Pouring over the various checkpoints to reach my first class of college August 24th. I have created list after list, calculated, searched for jobs, filled out various applications, and conducted mini surveys of my mind about how it might be. Gah! I am tiring myself, sitting at home and participating in these silly brain games associated with the “to be’s” and “not to be’s”. Can the summer approach any slower than the sluggish pace it has carried over these past four weeks?

Summer, if you’re listening, this is not the time to be lazy.

Yours truly,

Anna